Introduction

Whoever came up with the saying that "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger" must have been a psychic and saw my life story coming. The reason I am starting this blog is because I have lived a very interesting life thus far. In the beginning, there was the good life. It was joyous, filled with love, loved ones, and good memories. You couldn't have found a happier child than me. That was then; this is now. Now I'm cranky, selfish, damaged, and some could argue a bit slutty. But that is a part of my overall charm.

For the latter half of my life (up to the present), people have always come to me for advice. "Tell me what you think about this. What should I do about that?" Despite the many issues I have in my own life, people keep coming for more of my off-the-cuff, brash, homespun wisdom that rubs you just the wrong way. And it seems the advice must be helpful because they all keep coming back for more of it. So, rather than continuously waiting to solve a problem, I thought it was best to take everyone's advice for me and start dishing out the general rules of living a good life with a better you. You have to understand that life is sometimes hard ... hell, life is almost always hard. You have just got to laugh your way through it.

From time-to-time you will read this blog and find the most ridiculous ramblings you have ever heard. They will be politically incorrect, offensive, and borderline racist (if not completely racist). But just know now that if my words offend you that's because they are intended to get your attention; just read between the lines, because the lesson is in there hiding. You'd be amazed at how much you can absorb with a little distraction sneaking the knowledge in.

I want to dedicate this blog to those out there like me. You have suffered for many years, and although there are mostly bad memories to share, sharing them has been the most therapeutic part of your life. It is through sharing your tragedy and pain that comedy and joy can happen for others. And maybe somewhere in all this sharing you stumble on a little joy yourself.

As you read my blog from time-to-time, I hope you enjoy the stories and take away a little fun lesson while having a good laugh. So bring me your questions, comments, "outrageous objections," and concerns. If there's a story to be told, I will tell it. If there's advice that needs to be dished out, I'm the chef.

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